First, let me say I think men are great just as they are.
That is, as they authentically are.
I did a Ted Talk called, Re-imagining Masculinity and BEFORE you watch it, I want you to know where I´m coming from, so that my message for you is clear, and hopefully, positively impacting.
We live in a world where Masculine Shame, or ¨Toxic Masculinity ¨ is hurting is all.
First what is Toxic Masculinity? It´s a repressed masculine. It´s boys and men being essentially forced to repress human emotions, such as pain and fear, in order to be some idealized form of what we view as manly.
If you aren´t allowed to feel fear, pain, loneliness, even love, what´s left? Anger and aggression? Naturally, this cocktail is toxic for the masculine being, and those around him.
(Body dysmorphia for women is a similar disease that arises out of unattainable physical demands on how women look.)
In my talk, I make a plea to women to stop emasculating men.
But I think the real power to change this state for the masculine is MEN themselves.
Just as women have reversed the tide of negativity toward femininity and motherhood over decades, men can turn this tide of ugliness toward the masculine in positive ways.
Being defensive, withdrawing your hearts, withholding from women or hating women, in secret, is not the ticket. It´s not the way of masculine power.
Re-imagining Masculinity is a movement that I want to put on the map — to stop this downward spiral of the masculine, and to shine a light on the power and beauty of AUTHENTIC MEN.
I won´t deny that men have hurt women. We could fill encyclopedias with the ways.
We could even say that men deserve to go through this channel of doubt in response to how they have historically oppressed women.
But that wouldn´t help — because we need you, and we love you. Strong, heart-centered men are essential to our human evolution, and for peace in the world.
So, please, throw off that cloak of shame and Re-imagine Masculinity in a new, powerful light – one that is about claiming love as the highest truth, standing for wholeness in men and boys, and advocating for the power and safety of women.
PLEASE send your thoughts by responding to this email. I´d like to put them all together and share them, if you´re open to that.
*** My talk was shot in the time of Covid. So please forgive the background strangeness and any way that I didn´t get this exactly right. Our LIVE event was cancelled and so we recorded the talks.