This is How you Open Her…

What creates openness in a woman?

Or rather, in a healthy woman?

I say “healthy” because a woman who is defended is not going to respond well to attempts to open her.

Being open will feel threatening to her.

On the other hand, a woman who is available for a relationship wants to open herself, and wants to be with a man who provides the right conditions for that.

“To open a woman,” is a bit of a misnomer – in that a man provides the space more than he causes the result.  Whether a woman opens or not is her choice, in the end.

So, how does a guy provide that space and those right conditions?

It really comes down to how you hold her in your mind’s eye and heart.


If you have a positive regard for her (meaning you see the best in her, even when she’s struggling), and you are sincerely interested in her well-being, you are offering a welcoming space.

If you listen for more than the words she shares with you, (as the words are only trying to get at the feeling and meaning) and you practice empathy (imagining how it would feel to be her) you are, indeed providing the best kind of space.

For anyone to be open with you, they need to trust the intent behind your invitations. That is often where men need to focus most, rather than on the right words and gestures.


You want to be able to ask: “How is work going, or how are you feeling these days,” with the openness of a student, eager to learn and discover something new about his mate.

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