Good Sex is Never a Given

It’s a shame that so many of us think good sex is a given in a relationship — because this kind of thinking destroys relationships — by setting up unrealistic expectations.

Good sex is not a given — not over time. In fact, what’s more likely, is that you will grow tired of each other and stop making love, because that’s how nature functions, unmitigated.

I wish that people would get this, because then they’d stop waiting until their genitals dried up to work on their sex lives!

Great sex is cultivated, so that a dark, sexual winter can be avoided.

People who have great sex lives, focus on sex and make love consistently. They make lovemaking a grown-up priority in their lives.

And yes, they schedule sex!


It is not abnormal to lose interest. It’s abnormal is for interest to last — without a commitment it.

A commitment means taking charge of what you experience together – so that that your sex life doesn’t go to seed.

What do you do, personally, do to avoid this inevitability? Do you find yourself thinking it “should” be better, and therefore, doing nothing?

I’d love to hear your thoughts on this? Does this change anything for you?

3 thoughts on “Good Sex is Never a Given”

  1. I think it’s fine until the woman hits menopause and no longer wants sex. Then the husband is left to fend for his self. Such a shame when this happens then the years go by with no intimacy at all. I don’t have any answers for this.

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